Feeding is a Journey
Feeding is a journey.
Exclusively breastfeeding, bottle feeding, formula, expressed breastmilk, donor milk, or a little bit of everything.
Feeding your baby is freaking hard work.
Each method of feeding comes with its own set of challenges, which is why, simply put, nourishing a little life is just hard.
Our feeding journey:
Our feeding journey has been exclusively breastfeeding for just over 10 months now, and I find myself counting down to my goal of one year.
She did not take to expressed breast milk in a bottle at first so I stopped trying because it was honestly really hard mentally having to dump milk down the drain that she attempted to drink but didn’t.
Months later we tried expressed breastmilk in a bottle again, and she sucked it right down, but timing was hard to navigate breastfeeding and breast pumping with my supply… not to mention it was rather difficult to figure out how to wash pump parts/bottles without a functioning kitchen at the time (renovating with a baby, who thought that was a good idea lol)
When I questioned my milk supply I bought formula to try since she was then willing to take a bottle… and that was a hard pass from her. So that was $28 and perfectly good formula wasted.
So we have simply continued what has always worked well for us, exclusively breastfeeding.
I am grateful that have been able to be with her and available to feed day and night for the past 10 months, but there is a mental challenge that comes with the realization that they are reliant on you and only you to feed. I did not realize the weight I carried with that until some of it lifted when she started to eat foods, I was no longer the sole provider of nutrition.
There are certain things in life (and many in parenthood in general) that just need to be done so you don’t really think about them, and just do it. Exclusively breastfeeding has been that for me. I do not think about it as being work or hard on my body or exhausting… I just do it.
But with my recent transition back to work I have been breast pumping some again, and man SEEING that milk…
There is just something about seeing your breastmilk that puts permanence behind your hard work.
My body is not used to the breast pump which comes with its own challenges with supply, but we’re doing the best we can.
There is something about seeing your breastmilk that puts permanence behind your hard work.
I love our time together feeding- looking into each others eyes, her touching my mouth asking for kisses, holding my hand, her little crossed feet, her smiles mid feed…
It is time together that I will cherish and remember forever, but I also cannot help but think about what it will be like to not be needed in such a vital way.
… but I know I’ll miss it.
beautiful photos captured by Reverie Photo Co.
That’s the hard part with parenthood; despite the challenges, you love it & know you’ll miss it someday.
